Homeschooling, Shaken Not Stirred

How to teach Math.
This is how I homeschool, with shot glasses and pill bottles.


Were there pennies or Gin in those glasses?
It's a math lesson. How many shots can a 5 year old drink before she can't drive anymore? It's very advanced math that involves fractions. For example, if your shot has 1/3 orange juice and 1/3 pineapple juice, how much vodka will you need to complete your shot?
If the student gets it right, they get to take the shot. It's a reward method of teaching that works amazingly for children.
For those of you who are concerned by my methods, let me take a moment to explain my homeschooling philosophy. It is my goal to prepare my children for higher education. I feel that introducing them to drinking games in Kindergarten is a distinct advantage.

Math with shot glasses
Now before Social Services and the Police are knocking on my door, let me say that even though she handled her liquor very well, I still didn't let her drive, so you can relax.

My child can't actually do fractions yet so only the teacher got her drink on. Or we might have just counted pennies. Whatever.

14 comments:

San said...

LOL!!! You had me worried a little there! But your girl looks so pretty! :)

Enjoyed your blog...

Came over from SITS :)

bluecottonmemory said...

When I taught college composition, my students had to 1) develop an argument with 3 reasons why alcohol is bad for the college student (grades, relationships, job opportunities), and then create a seminar teaching college students how to host a party responsibly (site preparation - no not decoration - safety; how to handle a drunk, and emergency procedures - CPR, etc).

I think you need to include this with your mathematics! What a holistic combination!

bluecottonmemory said...

When I taught college composition, my students had to 1) develop an argument with 3 reasons why alcohol is bad for the college student (grades, relationships, job opportunities), and then create a seminar teaching college students how to host a party responsibly (site preparation - no not decoration - safety; how to handle a drunk, and emergency procedures - CPR, etc).

I think you need to include this with your mathematics! What a holistic combination!

The Boob Nazi said...

She is so cute!

Dione said...

It's good for you that my husband no longer works for Child Protective Services!

Your cute daughter looks so proud!

I know your real name - neiner, neiner, neiner!

Anonymous said...

You might want to start her out with...hmm...let's say about a quarter of a piece of nicarette gum so that she can have the advantage of starting at maybe two packs a day instead of starting out slow like the rest of the students. - the grandma-

coach said...

Funny post but my wife has never given alcohol to her children! Same girl that asks if it's ok if she drinks soda or eats candy. I never asked when I was a kid. She is a pretty cute girl. I like her!

foxy said...

Love it! That is so funny. Can I come over for your next class? I'm really good at shots!!

LisaLisa said...

Dropping by from SITStas....LOL you really got me with this post. Very good....lol Wishing you a wonderful Holiday . I'm following you now!

Punk said...

Imagine what kind of damage she could do with the Stanford Axe with this kind of headstart on drinking games! Oh man, that's how history is made.

I applaud you. *golf clap*

Rachel@just another day in paradise said...

dude. if i was to homeschool, i would totally need shotglasses and pills. . .then again, I feel like i need them anyway. . .if you sent me your address, i'll send you one of my super-duper (not yet filled-out) christmas cards that will TOTALLY make your christmas. . .or you can use it as a coaster. . .whatever.

Jessica Jones said...

That has to be the funniest thing I have read all day!

chrisy said...

Thanks for visiting my blog! Love your blog...and hope its not too late to wish you a Merry SITSmas!

Amber Page Writes said...

You are one funny lady. It's never too early to learn how to calculate shots, is it?