Let's Talk About Erectile Dysfunction

I think it's been clearly established that I watch a little bit of sports on T.V. Aparently people like myself (humans with boobs)  aren't the main demographic for this kind of programming. Which is no doubt why sports shows are constantly being interrupted by commercials about electronics, other sporting events and medications that will help a man get an erection. I suppose it's only common sense to air advertisements of this nature when men should be watching T.V. If you wanted to research your best option for birth control or what kind of femine product will make you feel the freshest while you aren't at your freshest, then you should be tuning in during the hours of 10am and 2pms, oops, I meant pm.

About a month ago I saw the commercial below for Viagra for the first time.

I was concerned that not everyone would be familiar with Viagra, so for my Amish readers, it's a popular drug used in fighting Erectile Dysfuntion. I was furthered concerned that not all of you would know what Erectile Dysfunction is. Maybe you've heard the phrase but unless you've wikied it like I have, you are most likely under-informed. According to the Great and Mighty Wikipedia:

Erectile dysfunction (ED, "male impotence", or "Baby-D Syndrome") is a sexual dysfunction characterized by the inability to develop or maintain an erection of the penis sufficient for satisfactory sexual performance.

The Wiki article goes on to use words like hydralics and organic. God bless you, Wiki. God bless you.

Now that we are all familiar, let's take a little look-see shall we.

Several things about this commercial stood out to me.

First, this man's pleasant stroll to the doctor's is interrupted by his own reflection.

Second, his reflection nags him like a wife or mother might. "Are you going to talk to him about our ED?" I half expected it to ask him if he had on clean underwear and had washed behind his ears. Also, since when is it "our" ED? It's like when a man says, "We are pregnant." Let's double check that, shall we? Which one of us looks like a heifer with cankles?

Third, that this man was embarrassed to mention his Erectile Dysfunction on a public street that appeared to be full of men that had just escaped from the Matrix, however, arguing with his reflection in public didn't phase him at all. Just like a man to worry more about his penis then his pyschological well-being.

Finally, the neverending list of side-effects for this medication. Which include but are no doubt not limited to:

Diarrhea;

dizziness;

flushing;

headache;

heartburn;

stuffy nose;

upset stomach.

Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue);
chest pain;
fainting;
fast or irregular heartbeat;
memory loss;
numbness of an arm or leg;
one-sided weakness;
painful or prolonged erection;
ringing in the ears;
seizure;
severe or persistent dizziness;
severe or persistent vision changes;
sudden decrease or loss of hearing;
sudden decrease or loss of vision in one or both eyes.

Um, yeah, so, at least you and your wife can have sex now. You don't even mind the vision loss, massive diarrhea or numbness all over the right side of your body. Seriously, why does everyone make such a big deal over the irregular heartbeat thing? It just adds to the thrill. You better have as much sex now as you can, because your ticker might give out at any minute, but, hey, at least your penis will work.