Troy, You Suck.

It was a busy weekend over here. In addition to the NFL draft, which lasts two days in case you were fortunate enough not to know, we went to go see Fall Out Boy Sunday night.
Driving to the show was an experience I will always treasure. I piled into a 5 passenger car with five boys (plus me) and then I listened. I listened to what boys talk about when they are together. I was struck by how much they sounded like girls. I also figured their conversations would be more focused. They're not. Very jumbled. Very unfocused. Until one of them said, "I was reading about the strange sex habits of animals".

Then everyone was listening.

Apparently there is a species of octopus that has a detachable penis. As impressive as that is garter snakes have two (though they aren't detachable). That's right two. That just screams trouble. I also learned how long gorilla and duck penis' are. I am so much smarter now. I wonder if I'll ever be able to use this information perhaps during a game of trivial pursuit or while homeschooling my children. OK maybe not the last one. This particular conversation ended when one of them wondered out loud if he could push his own penis back into his body thus creating a sort of penis innie and another one of them encouraged him to try it sometime to find out. Come to think of it they didn't sound like girls at all.

After listening to an hour of boys talking about baseball and penis' I was subjected to 2hrs of warm-up bands. First was Hey Monday a Paramore type band that I like alot. Then All Time Low who were good enough, meh. Up next in the never-ending line-up, Cobra Starship who were kind of awesome. The lead singer had alot of charisma and it made the whole show better. The final warm-up band was MetroStation. Being honest, they had the most radio hits of all the warm-up bands, but wow, did they suck. Their lead singer was super annoying like he was trying too hard or was too in love with himself or something. And then... (screaming fanfare) Fall Out Boy!

They were spine-tinglingly awesome. The only thing I didn't enjoy was Pete Wentz talking in between every song. Seriously, dude, you can go from one song right into the next one once in awhile. That being said, I'm not a reviewer but Wentz spotted one in the audience and he requested that the reviewer write, "This is the most awesome song ever (America's Suitehearts), by the most awesome band ever." So there you go Wentz, at least someone wrote it.

Which brings me to why Troy sucks. First, they failed to sell-out their little college arena. Then the people who were there just stood there. This was a rock show people! A really good rock show. Jump around, scream, convulse, something. You don't just stand there while Fall Out Boy is rocking your brains out. I'm seriously disappointed in you, Troy.

Penis

11 comments:

Punk said...

USC Trojans

Missy said...

Awesome.

Aren't you glad I didn't link to any pictures? I briefly considered it. The internet is a scary place.

Punk said...

I love inside jokes. I really do.

And, yes, I am incredibly grateful you didn't link to a picture of an "inny" penis, because you know that I would have clicked it and looked at it and gotten skeeved out and then maybe cried.

I am surprised that you didn't link to any FOB pictures. Not even any music vids? I'm appalled.

Missy said...

Actually the words America's Suiteheart are linked to the music video. (get with the program)

I just added a link to Pete Wentz for you. I was tempted to make the link route to a picture of Trent Edwards. I should have totally done that.

Punk said...

I think you should have! That would have been the greatest sneak attack in the history of the world!

Missy said...

"That would have been the greatest sneak attack in the history of the world!"

Truer words have never been spoken.

Punk said...

SNEAK ATTACK!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvz0bvYmnto&feature=rec-HM-fresh+div

Oh, was that not sneaky enough?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpU78IeTx_c

Punk said...

PETE WENTZ IS STILL BROOOOO-KENNNNN!

Punk said...

Thank you for fixing Pete Wentz. You're like the greatest rock star therapist in America. Or India. Depending on who the rock star is.

Missy said...

There are Indian Rockstars? I guess I should probably know this since I'm the EUROPEAN dodgeball champ and all.

Punk said...

I meant Indian therapist-to-the-stars, like a yogi, but, on that note... haven't you heard of bhangra?

*Doing little dance*

Mr. Punk despises bhangra, but it makes me all happy and dancy feeling. It helps that the chahead likes it too. He doesn't dance but he nods to the beat which is almost like dancing.

The Ashman prefers punk. A conversation for a later date, I'm thinking.