Since this is the first year I've blogged on my anniversary, I was trying to decide how I should handle it. I've seen a lot of people recap their marriage each year on their anniversary. I've already done a post like that and while it might be shocking to know, I really try not to repeat myself too much. I could gush about Matt, but that always makes me uncomfortable when people gush about the one they love on the Internet. Seriously, boys, if you want to tell your girlfriend that she's special to you and you love her, don't facebook her. PICK UP A PHONE. Clearly, I prefer to tell people how I feel in person.
Sorry, rant over.
Matt and I met when we were nineteen. I remember when we sat down with his parents at twenty and told them we wanted to get married. "You are too young. Please wait," they begged. When it became clear that we weren't budging on the issue, his mother made just one more request, "Please at least wait until 2002."
We obliged her request and got married on the first Saturday in 2002.
So I was reading one of the blogs I frequent. A definite guilty pleasure. One of the authors was sharing how he and his girlfriend had begun to seriously discuss marriage and some of the commenters gushed and congratulated, but some warned that they were too young. They don't have it together enough to be married. One commenter's thoughts so disturbed me I feel the need to share them with you:
My recommendation would be to NOT get married and to fornicate. Seriously. Don't get married. With your job situation and schooling, either practice some self control or just have sex and get married in a couple of years. Knowing what I know now and looking back 18 years I would run from you like a hooker from a cop. Not that I don't think you'll eventually get your sh** (edited b/c this is my blog and we don't swear here) together, it just wouldn't be while trying to be married and producing those 12 kids you want. So if you can't wait for the sex, do it, but don't get married.I seriously hope he runs from this advice like a wise man from a fool. He is young, we were young, my parent's were young. Age has nothing to do with how successful your marriage will be. It's about the choices you make. The love you choose to give. The respect you choose to share.
I know. I am going straight to hell.
When we got married, we chose to repeat traditional vows. For some using their own words means something but for me using the words that so many before had used meant something. In the vows you say, "I promise to love and cherish you..." A promise isn't a feeling, it's not a binding contract, it's a choice. Everyday each person in a marriage chooses how to treat their spouse. Those choices decide how your marriage will work out.
Tomorrow I'm leaving for a ten day vacation to Jessica's without my husband. I'm pretty sure he won't read this until after I leave so I'm going to do the thing that I hate. I'm going to do it because I know Matt likes the attention and if he can put on eyeliner for me and let me wax his back because it lifts my spirits (yes, I am bizarre, I thought we had already established that) then I can do this for him.
Matt, I love you. You are a good and loving man, and I notice and appreciate the things you do for me, big or little.
Internet Buddies, I apologize for that. It was very out of character. Tomorrow's post will have dinosaurs and I might even try to work the word penis into it, I promise.