Ahem, as is often the case when you discuss funerals, we began to discuss what the wake/funerals of our loved ones should be like. My Dad has gone on record as saying he would like us to have a pizza party to celebrate his life. My Irish Pirate said that she intends on handing out shots of Jack Daniels at her husband's funeral (It's his favorite drink). I, for one, am all about that. I've always found wakes particularly creepy and figure that a little Jack Daniels couldn't hurt. If anyone cares, when I die, I'm OK with being cremated. You can sprinkle my ashes on the Buffalo Bills field. After the sprinkling ceremony, if the weather permits you may have a bonfire as a way of recreating my cremation and then everyone can have smores.
I continued to contemplate death well after our phone call ended. Finally, I decided that I needed enlightenment so I headed to the Chinese Buffet. I patiently waited for enlightment to come while I ate a variety of foods cooked in soy sauce. After I finished my meal, the server brought out the enlightment. I eagerly opened my cookie and read it.
New people will bring you new realizations, especially big issues.
Those Chinese are wiser and deeper than I anticipated. I like to think that I'm reasonably smart, but they have blown my mind with this wisdom. I'm confounded. Are new people bringing me higher enlightment or drama? Am I supposed to avoid new people or embrace them? Is it appropriate to discuss medical issues at lunch? All these questions had my head spinning and I went into a bit of a panic. I tore into the rest of the Enlightment Cookies on the table and read through them.
If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.
Your winsome smile will be your sure protection.
In order to take one must first give.
After meditating on all of this wisdom, here is my interpretation: New people will enter my life, and they will help me realize what I stand for. However, these same new people will be loud, meddlesome and overopinionated, and the drama they bring will cause me to become overwhelmingly foolish and gullible unless I use my secret weapon (a winsome smile) to combat the drama. However, before I can put any of this newly found elightment to use, I must first pay my lunch bill.
Whew, enlightment is exhausting.
The moral of this post is: When searching for enlightment for life's questions, skip the fortune cookies and just ask the Magic 8 Ball.
Because I find great joy in poking at people's brains, I have yet another question for you. Do you think it's morbid to plan your own wake/funeral?
Because I find great joy in poking at people's brains, I have yet another question for you. Do you think it's morbid to plan your own wake/funeral?
