European Sun, Art and Child Labor

Back in 2007 Coach, the kids and I went to Italy to visit his Aunt and various other family. I thought I'd share some of the pictures from that trip. What? Not current enough for you? Would you like another "I cleaned my house today" post? Perhaps some more Jonas Brother videos? O.K. Italy it is.

We spent the first week of our vacation at the beach. There were nine of us stuffed into a tiny, non-air conditioned two bedroom apartment. But the view was killer and the weather was incredible.

Can you see the rocks in the water in the distance? Funny story. Coach's Godmother, G.G. and I decided we wanted to swim out to the rocks. No biggie, a lot of people were. Getting out there was easy and we hung out there for a minute or two and then tried to figure out how to get back into the water to get back to shore.

G.G. found a rock to slide down, but I chose to go another way since the rock looked all dirty and had tiny crabs living in it. (I'm a big baby, whatever.) When G.G. got back to shore she plopped down on one of our lounge chairs and put her legs up. Just then a very kind Italian woman came running up to her to get her to put her legs down. Apparently when she slide down the rock she ripped the crotch out of her swimsuit. With her legs propped up she was flashing the entire beach her goods.

I've never been more grateful to be a wuss about creepy crawlies then I was that day.

Bella spent the whole week in the water. Except in the evening when we would go to the carnival they had set up on the strip and eat gelato. Honestly, if I could groundhog's day any week in my life it might be this one. When in Rome do as the Romans seems an appropriate adage for this picture. This is my nudie Braden on the beach. All the little kids were either topless or nude. Don't you love how he politely covered himself up. Such a good boy.

After we got back from the beach we spent some time in Beltiligo with family and then Coach, G.G. and I hopped on a bus for a three day trip to Florence. We were a little concerned that we wouldn't be able to get around with our extremely limited Italian vocabularies. As luck would have it more people speak English than Italian in Florence or at least it seemed that way. We also managed to find an Irish Pub. Go figure.We went to Pisa and saw the leaning tower. We didn't bother to climb it because there was a two hour wait and they charged a fortune for it. It was cool to see up close though. And yes, there are A LOT of people standing around pretending to hold up the tower. They're everywhere.

We went to the Uffizi and the gallery that houses the David. I didn't know, (maybe you did) but the David isn't David from the Bible. He was an athlete. They used to compete in the nude. Since I've learned this everytime I think about a QB taking the snap from the center I giggle. I can't help it. The visual is too much to take. All disturbing imagery aside, the David was far and away my favorite part about Florence. I think I didn't expect much. I've seen so many replicas, but the original is downright breathtaking.
The hall on the way into see the David is full of half finished sculptures that Michelangelo had been commissioned by the church to do. (he died before they were completed) Huge boulders with like a perfectly formed arm sticking out of them. Kind of like Han Solo when he was frozen by Boba Fett. Yes, I just made a Star Wars reference while talking about the art of Michelangelo. I can only hope you love me enough to forgive me.We also checked out the Duomo. It's the one place that G.G. really wanted to see. She also really really wanted to climb the bell tower. It's 463 steps. This is a picture out one of the many windows on the way up. You can see the Duomo Cathedral out the window which is pretty cool.Meanwhile back at the homestead, my Mother-in-law and her sister had put my 3 year old child to work in the vineyards. It's good work for children. Their backs don't ache as quickly, plus I'm not sure what the child labor laws are in Italy but I'm sure this doesn't violate any of them.
She actually went out every morning with them and picked the fresh veggies. It was the highlight of her day I think. That and the chickens out back. This is a picture of my Mother-in-law introducing Braden to the great European tradition of the bidet. I'm totally going to pull this bad boy out and lay it on the coffee table when he brings girlfriends home.
I'd really love to hear the captions you guys can come up with for this picture, I really would.


Anonymous said...

Awesome blog. Makes me wanna go back so badly. I just might.

caption for braden's picture

"Hey check me out! Woman cleaning my ass with some water here. yeah i thought so. now make me a sandwich"

Dione said...

Well, I'm glad you posted about Italy, even if it's a bit overdue!

Do you think the bidet is the reason why Europeans don't bathe so much? I've been wondering about this for years.

Okay, a caption: "Woah! Wha... Aaah, I feel curiously refreshed"!

The Football Wife said...

"Move over Pampers -- there's a new wipe in town!"

Mr. Punk said...


"Bidet, mate!"
"Braden's Bidet (big day)"
"Be Clean. Bidet."

coach said...

I love Italy I do! I claim to be the biggest Italian going today! I even wear a guido chain sometimes. That trip however to the beach was tough. 9 annoying people trapped in the smallest apartment known to man. Myself not wanting to go to the water as much because of my fear of sun. I love Italy but not the beach.
Florence was excellent! I have been there a few times now and it keeps getting better. For all you single men that is the place to go. No doubt!!!!!!!!!!!
The bidet is absolutely wonderful. When i was younger i had a foot problem and i actually used it for the foot. Its excema guys. My Nona tried she really did! God bless that woman!
Once again great blog you sexy beast!

coach said...

Futura Primo Ministro de Italia messa culo en bidet! Spellings may be wrong but it's supposed to say the future Prime Minister of Italy putting his butt in the bidet. Ladies he will only get cuter!