How I Rate Compared To Megan Fox

You might have noticed that even though it's been my habit to write about my Buffalo Bills on Mondays, I didn't last week. Actually I'm absolutely positive you noticed. I'm sure you've drawn up an outline of all my quirks and habits that I divulge on this blog. Don't worry, it's completely normal. (unless your outline is color coded then you might consider professional help)

Anyway, the reason I haven't written about them is because not only is my hottie QB not playing (the scrambled brain issue still) but we lost. (kind of like if he had been playing) As a sidenote, Rachel, you were dead on. Trent was on the sidelines sans his helmet, hair blowing in the breeze. So Pretty. Well there isn't really much to say when my team plays like garbage so I figured I'd spare you last week. This week I'm excited to say, we didn't lose!!! It was our bye week, which means we had the week off. No game for us means no loss for us. I'll take it.

I put the extra time I have, now that I don't have any current Buffalo Bills news to catch up on, to good and practical use. I read blogs and then clicked blogs listed on those blogs in search of fun new people to stalk get to know. This is how I stumbled upon the Mormon Bachelor Pad. Before I start talking about this blog I'd like to say I have no idea how I've ended up reading so many Mormon blogs. I had no idea you guys liked blogging so much. Is it part of your church orders that you blog? While I'm asking questions about Mormonism, what in the world is a ward?

Back to the Bachelor Pad. I realize that some find this site obnoxious, but I'm so far removed from it that it feels like watching a soap opera. I can't help but giggle at them and their ridiculousness as I remind myself to let my own daughter know how dumb boys are. So this week the boys over at MBP outlined their system for rating girls. It's two-fold (I'm going somewhere with this I swear.) First, the Looks Only Scale (LOS) and then the Overall Scale (OS).

So let's be clear, I don't have enough self-esteem to be rated by someone else. However, I am more than delighted to rate myself using someone else's system. First let me say this is a very well thought out system that involves math. On a certain level it makes me wonder if any of those boys have actual jobs, but mostly I don't care.

Let's start with the Looks Only Scale. OK, being honest, and I know this might be a huge shock to all of you but I am not a 10. I told you it was shocking. I guess someone like Megan Fox would be a 10.

Yeah, I can't compete with that. Except on Sundays.

So while I can't compete with Megan Fox on the Looks Only Scale I feel I have a good shot at leveling the playing field using the Overall Scale. This is where personality comes in. I feel confident that I can increase my rating here. I'm funny (if you get my sense of humor), I'm nice (if I like you), I suspect that I might even be considered a person of substance. I feel that if you factor in my awesomeness I could be a 10 (just give it to me, I need this). You might argue that perhaps Megan Fox is a super-cool human too, but herein lies the loophole that is my saving grace.
MBP caps the OS at 10. If a LOS 6 is super awesome and that bumps them 4 points to a 10... (like me for example) and a 9 is just as awesome they do not jump to a 13. Perfect is perfect people. 10 is perfect live with it.
At this point I bet your wondering if I would rather just get my 10 from the LOS and not have to work for it using the OS. Perhaps ten years ago I would have said, "Heck Yeah! I'd trade everything I've got to look like Megan Fox." However, being ten years older now I realize that no matter how hot I could have been ten years ago I wouldn't look as good today. Let's keep it real, none of us look as good as we did ten years ago. I can honestly say that my LOS has definitely dropped. However, I'm every bit as awesome as I was ten years ago, I might be even more awesome now then I was then. I have to be, to maintain my 10 inspite of my rapidly falling LOS.

So, Megan Fox, let me just say that in the future when you're going under the knife to maintain your 10, I'll still have my personality... although I'm not against a little nip and tuck. But yeah, Personality.


The Boob Nazi said...

I stopped reading and deleted them from my sidebar after their fat thing today. It was harsh. I just want to ask, HOW OLD ARE YOU??? (Oh wait, 21.) I hope they mature.

Missy said...

I find them to be harsh as well, but like I said I'm so far removed from them and that stage in life that it doesn't affect me the same way it would if I were living, say, in Utah and hanging out with Mormon boys hoping to "catch" one. (I'm fat and my husband thinks I'm a 10, not a Megan Fox 10 apparently but at 10)

Punk said...

I agree with both of you.

I feel compelled to share that the Mister once told me that I am not hot. This back before kids and a lack of metabolism. No, no, I was incredibly CUTE, but I would never rate as HOT.


I was HOT, darnitol. I was the kind of hot that you bring home to your mother and say, gee, isn't she just the cutest thing you ever saw? And then try to get into a dark corner BECAUSE I WAS SO STINKING CUTE!

Bah. Chahead.

Dione said...

Hmmm, I might have to check out the MBP and see just how M this BP is. But just the fact that they're a BP means they're not your typical RM's... (Returned Missionaries) And if they're not RM's, then I wish them luck getting a MM (Molly Mormon).

P.S. Local congregations are called wards (or branches if they are very small)

Rachel@just another day in paradise said...

I like being right. : ) And I say we're all 10's, because there ain't no way I'm letting someone score me! : )