I Forgot To Tell You Something

I'm sorry about not getting a blog up last night. I've been super-busy over here with um... first I....um....OK fine you dragged it out of me. I've been obsessing over the Buffalo Bills, refreshing their homepage and checking their message boards for news out of camp. Coach had to bribed me with jewelry and then he waved my season tickets under my nose in order to get me off the computer and then I fell asleep. Oh, I didn't mention that the season tickets showed up? They're so pretty. I love them.

I bet you are a little concerned that in the midst of my obsession I've forgotten that I have kids. Your concern would have been valid, but those little buggers never stop talking. Not even the greatest Zen master in the world could tune them out.

Braden's conversations are pretty standard, "Do you like the Ninja Turtles?" (he asks everyone he meets this.) "I'm drinky." (thirsty) "My tummy is gun (going) to explode." (I have no idea what this means but it makes me laugh every time.) "Emuhgency, emuhgency!" (usually this means that a stuffed animal has fallen off his bed or he has run out of water and needs more.)

As for Bella, it kind of seems like "freaking out" is her catch phrase. She uses it all the time, ...they're freaking out, Nonna's going to freak out, etc. But the past few days she's started coming out with some classic stuff. Yesterday morning I was taking care of odds and ends...oh who am I kidding I was probably at the Bill's website. I need professional help. Anyway, my kids are fussing with each other because Bella wants to play with Braden but he really wants to play alone. They go back and forth for a few minutes and then I hear Bella say to him, "But Braden, I've always been there for you!"

This is true actually, when Braden was learning his ABC's, she was there. When he went through his matchbox car phase, she was there. When he wants to hear "Beat it" she puts it on for him. When he can't decide if he likes Leo or Donny better, she's there. Then why, for the love of Pete, won't he play Barbie's with her? Psh, boys.

Last night Coach had to work late and I put the kids to bed on my own. It's become custom after our usual bedtime routine of Bible and prayers, for me to make the kids repeat back to me the rules of bedtime. Braden has three rules that all pertain to staying in bed whereas Bella's only rule is "NO TALKING." It never works. Every night without fail she gets into bed, repeats her rule to me and as soon as I walk out of the room she says, "Mom, can I ask you one more thing?" She does this like five times. It's not aggravating or annoying at all. I swear I only made that no talking rule so she could have a rule to break like her brother does. Come to think of it he obeys his three rules much better than she does her one...hm. I digress.
So last night as I'm leaving the kids room, Bella does her usual "one more thing" routine and I turn to her and say in my kindest Michelle Duggar voice, "WHAT?!"

"When Daddy gets home to kiss me tell him I said, 'Behold, I am asleep'!"

By the time Coach came home I was ready for bed and neglected to pass on the message. So Coach, go and behold your daughter, she is asleep.

I too am headed for bed now. I'll no doubt have to swing by the Bills website to check it for updates. It's 1:25 am, I'm not sure what I think they'll be reporting on out in Western NY. I'm sure that all of the players are asleep. But you never know, it's entirely possible that the media will sneak into the players' rooms to report on their sleeping habits. And, if they should happen to stumble into TO's room and find him sleeping in a hyperbaric chamber with a sparkly sign above it that says, "Behold, I am asleep." I'll be the first to know.


Anonymous said...

epic stuff. One can truley not appreciate the classic quotes from the kids unless you have real conversation with them. To anyone who has not done this. I feel bad for you.

Punk said...

Why would TO sleep in a hyperbaric chamber, praytell? It's not a vampire thing. Vampires don't sleep, according to the most recently developed mythology (thank you, Stephenie Meyer, for enlightening us to this fact).

Though the sparkly sign and dramatic flair would be fitting.

I have a story and quote for you a la the Punk household (warning: it's a penis story):

So Ashman is potty training, right? Well, as it turns out, this is made easier and more enjoyable, I guess, when he just doesn't wear pants at all. Naked tushie all the way. So yesterday, I catch sight of him touching himself, and I say -- being a mother -- "do you have to pee?"

No, of course not.

So, the next logical question, I thought: So why are you touching your penis?

My two year old son's answer? "I like my peen."

Ah, yes. Such a man.

coach said...

There is nothing better than having a wife who is obsessed with my team. We may not agree on baseball but we agree on football and what other sport really matters.

Leonardo is the leader so he is obviously better!

In her defense she is a pretty OK mom! Not sure if I would reccomend her but she does OK in what she does.


coach said...

By the way the last comment was a joke she is a great Mom!